Saulander Evans
Writer/Editor and all around silly woman with a talent for the written word.
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Earth Day poem on Insomniacathon
Hey! I'm excited to say that my poem, 'Hunger for a Better Tomorrow', is one of 2 featured poems for Earth Day on Insomniacathon. I'm elated to be featured along with Kurt Vonnegut and his poem, 'Requiem'. I hope ya'll will check out the website. It's really a great place with over 30,000 readers monthly.
Monday, January 01, 2007
Entropy and Newton's Third Law of Motion
2006 was a year of vicissitudes; sadness and joy, elation and frustration -- a year of transition. Even as I tried to measure the entropy of my life, those things that were in disorder managed to align and joined forces to form a ‘more perfect union’, and those that were already aligned, zoomed out of control once again. Equal but opposite? Yes, that is what it seemed to me.
Newton’s Third Law of Motion states that for every action there is an equal yet opposite reaction. Frankly, I believe that this law applies to all aspects of life, not just motion. Life is in a constant state of motion – right down to the cellular level. Yet emotions are in a constant state of flux as well, and they tend to oscillate between highs and lows in equal numbers and intensity when summed up over the course of the year.
Even our perception of the passage of time is at opposite poles from youth to old age. When we are young and can handle a multitude of events in our lives, time passes so slowly that it seems to defy reality. Then as we mature, time accelerates past warp, blasting reality away but in the opposite direction – we seemingly have less time to perform the tasks that once took milliseconds in the vast scheme of our ‘virtual reality’.
Most people look at the New Year as a time to look ahead – to the future. Me, I tend to think about those things for which I am truly thankful. Yes, I know… that is supposed to be reserved for Thanksgiving; right? Well, I guess that is one of those differences in perception that I spoke of a moment ago. I think of Thanksgiving day as one where we enjoy the camaraderie of family and friends over a labor intensive meal that may disappear unusually fast, but is enjoyed more so than any other meal of the year. Then, after the madness surrounding the Christmas and Chanukah season, there is that brief time – at the stroke of midnight that ushers in the dawning of a new year – when reality shifts once again. During that infinitesimal moment, we tend to look back over the course of the year that just finished and make resolutions that will somehow improve the quality of our lives from that day forward. Unfortunately, most of those resolutions fail to materialize due to lack of forethought of the ‘virtual reality’ in which we live, Newton’s Third Law, and above all else, entropy.
Somehow, as my cells continue to age and time passes with an acceleration that increases with cruelty, I’ve realized that I should have made certain decisions well before the time that I got around to making them. It wasn’t as though I was a procrastinator, though. It was just that reality moved quicker than my brain cells and this shell of a body could match. Thus, I conclude that entropy will continue and Newton will buffer it to keep some semblance of order in my life.
In 2006, I divorced and remarried. I have already experienced love and devotion from my new husband, Joel, which surpasses my wildest imagination of what true love could possibly be. I gained a wonderful mother-in-law, who I call, Mom and who calls me her daughter. I have gain four wonderful children as well – two who are adults and two who are still in their formative years. Joel has gained another whole family as well, who loves him as if he were always one of the clan… always a close-knit family.
In addition, in 2006, my first novel, Choices Born of Prophesy, hit the bookstores, and there are more tomes to follow. I hope that those who read it will find it worthy of the page space and that the story instills hope and happiness, especially as the series continues to unfold in future volumes of the saga that depicts an alternate history of our world, one based in magic. Moreover, I have had the privilege to assist other authors with their work on their way toward a possible future as published authors.
Oh, that reminds me… many people have asked whether I have misspelled Prophesy. Although the most common spelling is prophecy, these two words do have a distinct difference. Prophecy can be any prediction of the future, whereas a Prophesy is a prediction with Divine Authority and in this context, always capitalized. Prophesy is rare in current times because most present day prophecies are not Heaven-sent. I hope this clears up the misunderstanding.
Anyway, as we march into 2007, let us do it without reckless disregard. May the forces of entropy align with Newton’s Law and culminate in a rich, full year of love, happiness, hope, and fulfillment of your dreams and aspirations.
1/1/2007
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Four-Legged Children
Amid all the excitement of my first novel’s publication, I’ve also been dealing with the reality that two of my four-legged children were preparing for their final journey. There was a time when I had six (2 cats and 4 dogs). Samantha, my Calico kitty, was the first to pass, so young as compared to the others. A few years later, Smoochie Woochie, my black lab, battled Addison’s Disease -- a non-painful affliction that required medications to keep her electrolytes in balance to prevent her from dehydration. The vet said it would be a miracle for her to live two years with Addison’s, even if I did everything right with her care because dogs, and especially labs, are emotional beings and high emotion, both positive and negative, can throw off the delicate balance of sodium and potassium in the body. Miracle of miracles, Smoochie Woochie lived three years after her initial diagnosis; yet, nine years after her death I still mourn her loss. Last year, after 20 years of life, Dijon Pretty Kitty left me mourning once again. Her passing left me with three remaining four-legged children already advanced in years.
Unfortunately, my two eldest dogs, Grunt and Sheba, both of whom were 16-years old, are no longer with me, having left this world on the same day, September 7, 2006. Grunt dealt with food allergies the last few years of his life, but once I learned what he had to avoid, most of those problems fell away. However, since late July, he lost so much weight (even with eating multitudes of food) that he became frail and the vet believes that cancer was the culprit. Sheba, on the other hand, had hip problems that finally stole her vitality. Now I have one child left who is 15-years old but I am fortunate that Wolfie enjoys good health.
Below are a few poems I wrote this summer about my four-legged children. Perhaps you have experienced similar events in your lives.
There is Never Enough Time
Two plus four minus one left five,
four-legged children –
one feline and four canine.
Never to have two-legged offspring,
simply wasn’t in the tarot cards.
Life for our four-legged kids
rarely exceeds a few years at best.
Many say one should be happy
no matter the time clock,
satisfaction has no guarantees.
You raise them,
nurse them,
teach them some manners.
They love you,
heal you,
teach you humanity.
Like a child, they quiver at thunder,
marvel with newfound pleasures or toys,
want only to be a part of your life --
family, is what they are not a possession,
not chattel –
mutual friends, confidants and protectors.
Was two enough with Samatha, the first to have passed?
No, Gods no!
Oh, how I miss how she’d suck on my hair,
thinking I was her mother!
Was seven enough time with Smoochie Woochie?
No, Gods no!
I still agonize over her loss and miss
how she’d sing for food or steal it off the back of the stove!
Was twenty enough time with Dijon Pretty Kitty?
No, Gods no!
Oh, how I miss how she thought she was a dog,
how she’d sleep with her head
inside the mouth of her canine brothers,
using their tongues as a pillow!
Will sixteen be enough time with Grunt and Sheba? Or however much time I’ll have with Wolfie?
No! It won’t be, but I have no control
over when their clocks wind down.
I’ll miss Grunt’s grunting and his
traipsing in and out of the doggie door as if on speed.
His days are running out and I mourn for him already.
I’ll miss Sheba’s calm demeanor that suddenly
reverts to her alpha pack-leader conduct.
It pains me to see Wolfie taking over her job,
Sheba does well just to stand on all fours of her own accord.
I’ll miss Wolfie’s seal-like stature,
his expressions, and the way he was always my shadow.
Wolfie, the only one of my three
remaining four-legged children who enjoys
good health and many more days before his
clock winds down.
Two plus four minus one left five,
Less two leaves me with three right now –
four-legged children,
but mine all the same.
Gods! There is never enough time.
8/20/06
Black Death
Black fur peppered with gray,
lying there like lumps of clay.
Anxiously I ask, ‘Are ya’ll okay?’
Cautiously, approach and pray --
‘Ka please, please! Not today.’
Darkness advances with the break of day.
Eons of love, more than I could say
and cherished memories of how we’d play.
Thank You Dear Lord for taking away
his and her black futures with another delay.
8/28/06
Mercy’s Needle
After sixteen long years, shortened by perspective,
heart wrenching decisions came pounding at the door;
one emaciated, the other saddled with hip pain,
both well beyond their breeds’ usual life span,
yet neither seemed anxious to leave this world behind.
Perhaps they knew how much I’d mourn their loss,
thus fought to stay each consecutive day.
Though both reached their sweet sixteen,
in their world they were closer to one-hundred-twelve.
Old Man Time took his pound of flesh and bone
but until then couldn’t rob them of their desires.
Looking in their eyes,
they related their new longing – release.
Mercy’s needle impaled two veins,
loving intonements chanted in whispers,
trying to remain calm for their benefit
as I watched their spirits lift from
their worn-out shells
paw-in-spiritual-paw
to frolic on another plane of consciousness.
Lump in throat,
tear streaked cheeks,
guilt filled my breaking heart
that I hadn’t made the decision earlier,
having waited until they asked me to let them go.
My mourning period now truly begins.
With all my love,
Rest in Peace Grunt and Sheba
and show each other the way.
9/7/06
.
Unfortunately, my two eldest dogs, Grunt and Sheba, both of whom were 16-years old, are no longer with me, having left this world on the same day, September 7, 2006. Grunt dealt with food allergies the last few years of his life, but once I learned what he had to avoid, most of those problems fell away. However, since late July, he lost so much weight (even with eating multitudes of food) that he became frail and the vet believes that cancer was the culprit. Sheba, on the other hand, had hip problems that finally stole her vitality. Now I have one child left who is 15-years old but I am fortunate that Wolfie enjoys good health.
Below are a few poems I wrote this summer about my four-legged children. Perhaps you have experienced similar events in your lives.
There is Never Enough Time
Two plus four minus one left five,
four-legged children –
one feline and four canine.
Never to have two-legged offspring,
simply wasn’t in the tarot cards.
Life for our four-legged kids
rarely exceeds a few years at best.
Many say one should be happy
no matter the time clock,
satisfaction has no guarantees.
You raise them,
nurse them,
teach them some manners.
They love you,
heal you,
teach you humanity.
Like a child, they quiver at thunder,
marvel with newfound pleasures or toys,
want only to be a part of your life --
family, is what they are not a possession,
not chattel –
mutual friends, confidants and protectors.
Was two enough with Samatha, the first to have passed?
No, Gods no!
Oh, how I miss how she’d suck on my hair,
thinking I was her mother!
Was seven enough time with Smoochie Woochie?
No, Gods no!
I still agonize over her loss and miss
how she’d sing for food or steal it off the back of the stove!
Was twenty enough time with Dijon Pretty Kitty?
No, Gods no!
Oh, how I miss how she thought she was a dog,
how she’d sleep with her head
inside the mouth of her canine brothers,
using their tongues as a pillow!
Will sixteen be enough time with Grunt and Sheba? Or however much time I’ll have with Wolfie?
No! It won’t be, but I have no control
over when their clocks wind down.
I’ll miss Grunt’s grunting and his
traipsing in and out of the doggie door as if on speed.
His days are running out and I mourn for him already.
I’ll miss Sheba’s calm demeanor that suddenly
reverts to her alpha pack-leader conduct.
It pains me to see Wolfie taking over her job,
Sheba does well just to stand on all fours of her own accord.
I’ll miss Wolfie’s seal-like stature,
his expressions, and the way he was always my shadow.
Wolfie, the only one of my three
remaining four-legged children who enjoys
good health and many more days before his
clock winds down.
Two plus four minus one left five,
Less two leaves me with three right now –
four-legged children,
but mine all the same.
Gods! There is never enough time.
8/20/06
Black Death
Black fur peppered with gray,
lying there like lumps of clay.
Anxiously I ask, ‘Are ya’ll okay?’
Cautiously, approach and pray --
‘Ka please, please! Not today.’
Darkness advances with the break of day.
Eons of love, more than I could say
and cherished memories of how we’d play.
Thank You Dear Lord for taking away
his and her black futures with another delay.
8/28/06
Mercy’s Needle
After sixteen long years, shortened by perspective,
heart wrenching decisions came pounding at the door;
one emaciated, the other saddled with hip pain,
both well beyond their breeds’ usual life span,
yet neither seemed anxious to leave this world behind.
Perhaps they knew how much I’d mourn their loss,
thus fought to stay each consecutive day.
Though both reached their sweet sixteen,
in their world they were closer to one-hundred-twelve.
Old Man Time took his pound of flesh and bone
but until then couldn’t rob them of their desires.
Looking in their eyes,
they related their new longing – release.
Mercy’s needle impaled two veins,
loving intonements chanted in whispers,
trying to remain calm for their benefit
as I watched their spirits lift from
their worn-out shells
paw-in-spiritual-paw
to frolic on another plane of consciousness.
Lump in throat,
tear streaked cheeks,
guilt filled my breaking heart
that I hadn’t made the decision earlier,
having waited until they asked me to let them go.
My mourning period now truly begins.
With all my love,
Rest in Peace Grunt and Sheba
and show each other the way.
9/7/06
.
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